Clark: what kind of starter are you using? May I suggest one that has a moose antler knob? the added weight and density of the moose antler gets the ball into the bore, no matter it's bhn. Once in the bore, it cannot be any tighter than any other ball, though, if if is elongated, there will be more bearing surface.
I recently (two days ago) re-sighted my Verner rifle. It has a Getz bbl. with .50 cal bore and the lands are WIDER that the grooves...not optimal. I loaded .016" denim patches with ease. But they didn't shoot particularly well at 50 meters. So I tried some .018" denim and had a $#*! of a time getting them into the muzzle. Now, this is cotton that is compressed as hard as possible between my thumb and forefinger, with help from my other hand. My philosophy is that that is how the ball/patch is received by the bore. The heavier patches shot better, and I was able to come to a satisfactory result.
But a heavy dense starter knob, with enough surface area that a smack with the other hand is all that is needed to start the ball flush with the muzzle, is vital.